lovenlosses

I waited at the station
Until the platform cleared
Tried calling your cell 
Heard your message, “Not here!”

You missed the last train 
Guess you had to work late
It’s becoming a habit
Always making me wait.

Had a list of reasons
Some better than most
I was getting creative
Though I hated to boast.

Running out of rexcuses
Too many alibis
I knew within my heart of hearts
They were nothing more than lies.

Apparently you met someone 
Perhaps you fell  in love
The time had finally come for me
To say, I’ve  had enough. 

We had to talk it over
It was time to tell the truth
I took her hand in my hand 
Told  her that, in fact …. I  knew.

She said that she was sorry
I helped her to move out
It was hard for both of us to say
 The truth we knew …out loud.

The grass is always  greener
The hope that someone new
Will be just what you wanted
A better  fit for you.

Still I go down to the station 
Every night,  I sit and wait 
Maybe some night you will  be there 
Arriving on the  10:08. 

Throw me a bone 
Toss me some crumbs
I don’t know any better
I am young and I’m dumb.  

You asked for my number
Then took me to bed
I fell for your sweet talk
Everything that you said.  

A wife or a girlfriend
In New Jersey or Queens?
No future with you
You are living the dream. 

A ton of hot women
In the clubs every night
Hoping  to hookup
Start a family, a life. 

But, the guys at the bars
Remove their wedding rings
They’re out to connect
Looking for just one thing. 

A sublet apartment
A sofa, a bed
A walk up in SoHo
Is as good as it gets. 

A few hours of passion
Should I call you an Uber?
No invitation to stay 
To relax or sleep over. 

You locate your dress
Your purse and your shoes
A kiss on the cheek 
You got screwed ….. you’ve been used. 

______________________

Google Images: Magnific.

So wildly painful
So fiercely charged 
Seems what I’m craving 
 Is  way too hard. 

Starved for affection
Withheld from me
Locked away
No,  I’m not free. 

 Kept inside 
A gilded cage 
Years held captive
So afraid.

To be set free
Is worth it all 
To take the risk
Though I  might fall. 

Years go by
My feathers grey
Hoping it will
Be today. 

Soaring high
Above the clouds
Free to fly
For miles and miles. 

Perched upon 
An olive branch
I’ll watch the seagulls
Soar and dance. 

The wind will blow
The sun will shine
I’ll be in heaven 
I’ll be just fine. 

____________________

Google Images. Vedic Yoga Wisdom

I told a girl I loved her
She smiled from ear to ear
She seemed  to be embarrassed
Her concern became quite clear.

“Two girls cannot get married!”
Boldly she did exclaim
I told her that I was aware
And yes, it was a shame. 

We sat down … next to each other 
Watched  some programs on TV
I kissed her cheek …..at least three times
She told me …. she liked me.

Six months into our  courtship
I gave her a friendship ring
She wore it …. just on Saturdays
Was not a fan of bling. 

She likes going to the movies
Vampires and ghosts….her thing 
She’s also into K-Pop
Likes the way that Rumi sings.

Yes, she’s a little different
On the spectrum… possibly
She claims that she is special
And yes…. she’s crazy about me. 

_________________________

Google Images: Unsplash

Sparks filled the air
Stars fell from above
I was elated
So madly in love.

No one before you
No one ever since
Could make me feel special
Let the magic begin. 

Walks by the river
Alone in the night
The cool summer breeze
Beneath the moonlight.

Your hands on my shoulders
Your warm firm embrace
The look in your eyes
The smile on your face. 

Forever and ever
Till the end of time 
I long to be with you
Said you’d always be mine. 

A party to lust
A complete sacrifice
Sharing our secrets
In the darkness of night. 

No second thoughts
Alive in the moment
No need to confess
Or beg for atonement. 

A plan for tomorrow
The rest of my life
You said it’s forever
You’d make me your wife. 

No need for alarm 
No need to think twice
No idle suspicions 
Or rolling of dice. 

A clear path ahead
Complete loyalty
No reason to doubt
Your allegiance to me. 

But, in a blink of an eye
You had found someone else 
I had no idea
No way I could tell. 

Cold and detached
Somebody new
Not the same person
Not someone  I knew.

A collision , a crash
Abrupt isolation
Pulled and untangled 
Without hesitation. 

My eggs in one basket
Yes, I was all in
From the day that I met you
To  the last bitter end. 

Out of the rubble
After years in a cave
Decades upon decades
Till I lay in my grave. 

______________________

Google Images: Sloth Cube Studios..

Pull the plug .. there’s too much water
I can’t swim , I’m going to drown
Ever since the day I met you 
I’ve been sinking further down. 

Overflowing, it keeps coming
The current swift, so dark and cold
I can’t take  this wind and thunder
I am losing all control.

The mud is thick , I can’t move
My boots stuck in the weeds 
I followed you , I always do
Giving in to what you need. 

So selfish and so heartless
I was a fool to follow you 
I threw caution to the wind
Thought your love was tried and true.

But now as fate would have it
Just beyond the water’s edge
Trapped below the surface
Very soon,  I will be dead.

____________________

Google Image. Vecteezy.

Got this pain inside of me
A heart  that just won’t mend
Though I try, nothing’s  working
Can’t stop the pain, it just won’t end.

Regret the day, the day I met you
You’re the one that broke my heart
You walked out, you left me here
My chest wide open,  torn apart.

The grief I feel, the pain so deep
It’s with me everyday
It clings to me, it won’t let go
Can’t shake it off, wash it away. 

It’s found it’s way into my mind
I’ve lost all control 
This sense of loss is killing me
Is there a cure? I’ve got to know.

CHORUS:

Got a  wound, no way to close it
A  heart that just won’t  mend
Though I try , nothing’s working 
No way it’s ever going to end.

The weight ….. too much for me to bear
Pulls me down, it holds me back  
it’s  wrapped around me inside out 
Is this a fatal  heart attack?

What can I do? Think I’m in shock
They say just give it time
I close my eyes, I try to sleep
Still I can’t find my peace of mind. 

CHORUS:

Got a  wound that never closes
A  heart that just won’t  mend
This pain won’t stop, it’s killing me
When will this madness ever end?

____________________________

Google Images. BROKENHEARTED. Psychology Today.

A sunken ship
Beneath the sea
The crew is gone
Since 43.

Nothing left
To draw upon
My oxygen
Used up, all gone. 

The room is cold
Ice on the walls
I feel like snow’s 
About to fall. 

Your gown is blue
No hat or gloves
No boots or shovel
To speak of.

No chance to talk
You disappear
I hear you say
“Get out of here!”

The door’s unlocked 
I walk on through
I look around
I look for you. 

Ice on the floor
Afraid to slip
Don’t want to stumble 
Lose my grip.

No one to ask
No exit signs
Don’t want to run
Run out of time. 

No pictures, paintings
To be found
No music playing
Not a sound.

Water rising
In the hull
My ankles covered
No one to call. 

I start to worry
Wonder why
The water’s rising
I start to cry. 

An open door
Leads to the sea 
Fish coming in 
They swim toward me. 

I’m whisked away
So little hope
Pulled to safety
With a rope.

Tied securely 
Round my waist
I recognize 
A friendly face. 

No gown, or ice
A cold wet suit
I see her face
She looks like you.

_______________

Google Images. PADI Blog.

Can’t forget the late night whispers
Your lips, your sweet caress
The nights the longing lingered
Your words repeating…..”Yes, oh yes!”.

Said you needed space, not pressure
Told me that you couldn’t breathe
I was fearful it was over
So afraid that you would leave. 

Those late nights, after hours
You were always home by five
But, said they needed you to stay
It’s clear that you had lied.

The slightest hint of jasmine
Lingered in your clothes
Thought I wouldn’t notice
Thought I wouldn’t know.

A stick of gum, some peppermint 
Did little to conceal
A glass of wine, maybe two
Said it wasn’t a big deal. 

Now lost, confused, bewildered 
Hard to accept such cold deceit
Lord knows… how much I loved you
Never thought that you would leave. 

No explanation, no excuses
No drawn out apologies
No arguing or confrontations
You were clearly over me. 

__________________________

Image: Google Image. Dreamstime.

A cold night in December
The winter winds prevailed
The night we met was kismet
As far as …. I could tell. 

Not knowing of the danger
While skating on thin ice
I was surely titillated 
Captivated and enticed. 

Showered with affection
A fairy tale come true
The promise of a future
A lifetime of loving you. 

No doubts, no trepidation 
No suspicions, or mistrust
Innocent and naive
Consumed with blinding lust. 

Too soon the words were spoken
Promises were made
No time for explanations
No way I could be saved.

Borrowed time, so unsuspecting 
Sand through the hour glass
With each step the ice was cracking
It all  happened way too fast. 

Chest deep …. beneath the water
Clearly in …. over my head
No lifeline or excuses
Just as cold, as it could get. 

No contact, disconnected
You had quietly moved on
Stepping stones to better places
It was over, you were gone. 

_______________________

Google Images: FriendlyStock.